The Best Psychic Story Ever. Really. Ever.


Regular readers will know, I like a good psychic. Or, rather, a bad psychic. Or, rather, I like the process of discussing and exposing someone who claims to be psychic. You get the idea. Often, discussions of psychics tend to look at false predictions they’ve made, outlandish murder-solving claims they put forward, or generally the grief-profiteering many engage in. And then there are the claims which are just jaw-droppingly, batshit insane. I’ll let you guess which of these categories we’re going to take a look at now, but to set the scene I’d like to take you to Port Angeles, America, where – as the Peninsula Daily News points out – poor Robin Alexis had recently moved, what with her burning desire for privacy. Just to reiterate, that’s as as the Peninsula Daily News points out. The Peninsular Daily News, is a newspaper. Privacy indeed.

Oh, I should have mentioned, Robin Alexis is described as ‘psychic Robin Alexis’. So, ‘psychic seeks privacy, says local paper’? Accompanied by a charming full photo of said privacy-seeking psychic? Ho hum, I’ll carry on…

“She’s found it a welcoming place, where she can develop a variety of ventures: her Mystic Radio program, her Web portal to psychic readings and her online Soul Spa, all at www.robinalexis.com.”

Again, to reiterate – seeking privacy here, the privacy to discreetly go about her radio program, web portal and soul spa. Ho hum ho hum.

Apparently, as the paper tells us:

“Alexis describes herself as more than a psychic; she’s also a spirit medium and “metaphysical mother” who is now in the midst of an extraordinary three-way conversation”

Quite what a metaphysical mother is, I’ve no idea. Surely it’s a mother who isn’t actually there, or is there but on another plane? Like a meta-mum?

Still, this privacy-seeking, self-professed meta-mum with a burgeoning-yet-discreet media empire to non-promote has a terrible burden – she, discreetly and in no way publicly, despite being in the paper about it, claims to have been communicating for ‘many moons now’ with… Michael Jackson.

Just to be clear, that’s deceased king of pop Michael Jackson, not the former Tranmere Rovers and Blackpool defender Michael Jackson, nor Canadian actor Michael Jackson, best known for his role as Trevor on Trailer Park Boys, nor even the soldier Michael Jackson from Massachusetts, wounded at Bunker Hill during the American Revolution (though admittedly one of those would still be impressive, not least because the Tranmere defender’s been notoriously reclusive since his retirement at the end of the season). No, she’s been talking – she non-publicity-seekingly claims – to the deceased former most famous man on the planet, Michael Jackson. Ho hum ho hum ho hum. Also, as a couple of footnotes – I’ve got to thank Wikipedia disambiguation for a few Michael Jacksons there, and I’ve also been listening to way too much Andy Saltzman on the Bugle podcast lately. Back to the psychic.

As the paper tells us:

“Alexis believes she has been communicating, for many moons now, with the late King of Pop. As in Michael Jackson. Like if he was on TV”

Quick quibble – communicating with him like as if he was on TV: not really all that impressive. TV is a one-way medium, after all. Like all spirit mediums, in that respect – they give out a signal, but there’s no way for anyone to get a signal back to them. Still, that’s splitting hairs – I promised you a left turn. I’ll let Alexis take up the story:

“I started seeing him in my third eye,” she said, “It was like he was on television, only “right here,” she added, tapping her forehead. “He started telling me right away: ‘I want to come back.'”

Are you ready for it?

Then, Alexis said, she received a phone call from an Olympic Peninsula woman — whom she said she’d never met — requesting a one-on-one psychic consultation.

Their conversation got under way, but Alexis had to tell her: “OK, this is completely weird, but I keep feeling Michael coming through,” trying to communicate.

The woman told her she already knew Jackson wanted to return to Earth, Alexis recalled; her husband knew about it, too, and both had agreed to bring a reincarnated Jackson back.

The woman isn’t pregnant yet, Alexis said. But she and her husband are preparing to be parents.

That’s right – not content with merely contacting the king of pop – this privacy-seeking psychic wants to bring the man back. Discreetly. And in no way publicly. I’ve ran out of ho hums.

You might imagine she’s had a LOT of people call bullshit on her in the past (as, incidentally, I am right now – because it is bullshit. Massively so). However, she has a tried and tested response to those doubting naysayers:

“..if one refuses to consider that her story is possible, then she says — “very respectfully” — something to the effect of “You do your thing, and I’ll do mine.”

She’d rather others would explore for themselves such phenomena.

“What I say to people is: Know, trust and act upon your own knowing.”

That’s right – if you know for near cast-iron certainty that it’s unlikely beyond comprehension that a) she’s talking to a dead Michael Jackson, b) she’s able to bring him back, and c) she can somehow magically inseminate him into the womb of a total stranger – then you go your way, and she’ll go hers, and you can both confusingly ‘act upon your own knowing’.

While she plans to continue counseling the couple, serving as the metaphysical mother who helps them get ready to bring a soul back into the world, she also hopes the mother- and father-to-be will connect with the Jackson family and with Jackson’s closest friends.

See – now THAT’S where the metaphysical mother fits in, I suppose.

The couple – a white woman and a black man, the article randomly pains to point out – are not paying her anything.

“These people don’t have any money,” she added.

Well that’s very noble of her, and very un-publicity-seeking… oh wait, sorry, there’s a bit more here, what’s this say?

Alexis, however, said she’s working with a documentary film producer on obtaining financing for a movie to tell the Michael Jackson story, including this new chapter.

She said the film, if made, will be titled “This Is Not It,” in counterpoint to the documentary about Jackson’s preparation for his final concerts, “This Is It.”

Again, just to recap for those at the back – this psychic moved away from LA to avoid all the publicity, now she’s ushering in the rebirth of Michael Jackson in order to add it to the filming of a documentary she’s working on as part of her media empire.

Meanwhile, Alexis and her husband, Bob Bordonaro, are developing the Soul Spa website along with Mystic Radio, a program airing on KKNW-AM 1150 in Seattle and available at www.robinalexis.com.

She hopes for national syndication of the show, and for expansion of her 100 registered members of her Web programming.

She also plays a metaphysical mother on TV, on the cable series, “The Real L Word,” about lesbian relationships. The show is on at 10 p.m. Sundays on Showtime.

Alexis’ book, Raising Humanity, available on her website, teaches soulful parenting: remembering to share joy with your child each day, visualizing the family life you want instead of dwelling on what you don’t want.

Again, this is all publicity-avoiding, of course…

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  1. #1 by Mike Boyce on July 17, 2010 - 18:02

    You should check out her website. She’s also a “Reiki Master” (you can subscribe to her “Beloved Mary Magdalene Reiki Healing Energy Portal,”), had an NDE when she was a kid(1), which included an encounter with none other than “Christ Jesus” (as she likes to call him), who has also visited her more recentlly(2).
    Jacko & Jesus: Now that’s what you call top-of-the-bill names, and possibly a good double act (though the name might have to be Jesus & Jacko, depending on who’s got more fans.)

    On a more serious note: She identifies herself as a victim of childhood sexual abuse(2) and has a private forum on this subject (http://www.robinalexis.com/content/were-you-ever-molested-or-raped).
    I only hope that the topic is handled carefully there and in such a way as not to encourage false memories of abuse/rape.

    1) Watch the video on her home page (and note the disclaimer)
    2) See blog entry for 07/15/2010 – 19:51 “Does the Michael Jackson name … abuse”

  2. #2 by Michael Gray on July 18, 2010 - 08:20

    You damn skeptics are all the same:
    Sane & honest.

  3. #3 by Gittins on July 18, 2010 - 23:28

    She does have one supernatural power – time travel. One look at her website and you’re back in 1998.

  4. #4 by John David on July 29, 2010 - 16:17

    Aside from her website giving me all sorts of headaches I’ve managed to glean the following items :

    “Her primary passion, however, is to help the feminine spirit connect to Mother Earth.” : Why, I wonder, is it that only feminine spirits can connect to the mother Earth… I am part of this Earth, I would like to connect to something, can I being (male) (gay) (non spirital) connect as well, or will it reject me, like being turned away from a nightclub because i’m wearing jeans ?

    “Robin became aware that she was psychic from the time of her first near death experience at age two.” : I’m sure that self-awareness of the level needed to decipher psychic ability from fantasy is developed a lot later than two years old… even to this day at my advanced (35) years.. I still sometimes talk to my stuffed lobster, and say thank you to my coffee maker (Tassimo)…

    “Medium: Talks to your spirit guides, angels and the deceased. She is able to do house and land clearings if you have spirits or ghosts.” : Darn, I need my house clearing (and probably vacuumning as well) – but I don’t have a spirit or a ghost, does that mean I can’t have it cleared ?

    I got this far before I just gave up – I could have probably at least six or seven hours of fun picking holes in this, but I’m about to finish my lunch hour… but finally on one of her pages she does say something i do agree with

    “IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: No Intuitive is 100% accurate. Robin advises, “Never give over your free will and personal responsibility to me, or to anyone else.

(will not be published)